I grew up in a town of about 1,200 people. In our town at that time we had a Catholic Church, A Lutheran Church, An Episcopal Church, A Church of God, an Evangelical Brethren Church, and our church, the Congregational Church. In our church we had a special letter that was framed and hung on the wall in the entryway. It said that our church was the Methodist Church for our community and it was signed by the Bishop of the Montana Methodist Church. And the letter also said that our church was the Presbyterian Church for our community and it was signed by an executive presbyter. That sign was important to me because I knew that my father’s family was Presbyterian and my mother’s family was Methodist so the Congregational Church was the place where they could all meet in our town.

Like us, our daughter lives in what is called a census designated area. It has a name like a town, but it is not organized or incorporated. Dalzell, South Carolina has a population of 3,417. But it abuts Sumpter, SC, which has a population of 42,757. There are a lot more people here than in the town where I was raised, so it shouldn’t surprise me that there are more churches.

Since we are in the south, there are a lot of Baptist churches. The first street we turn onto when exiting our daughter’s subdivision is Peach Orchard Drive. Shaw Air Force Base is on that street, before we get to the gate of the base, we pass Hopewell Baptist Church, Long Branch Baptist Church, Springbank Baptist Church, and Shaw Heights Baptist Church.

Back home, north of Seattle, we joke that the planning and zoning commission requires that there be no spaces where you can’t see a Starbucks. Go out the front door of a Starbucks and look to your left and you can see another Starbucks. Look to the right and you can see another Starbucks. Of course this is an exaggeration. But there are a lot of Starbucks coffee houses in Seattle and the surrounding area.

Baptist Churches around here are a bit like Starbucks in the Pacific Northwest. You can’t quite see Hopewell Baptist Church from Long Branch Baptist Church, but you don’t have to drive too far. In the greater Sumpter area you could choose from Alice Drive Baptist Church, Sumpter First Baptist Church, First Baptist Missionary Church, Sumpter Baptist Temple, Crosspoint Baptist Church, Crosswell Baptist Church, Bethel Baptist Church, Northside, Memorial Baptist Church, Eastside Baptist Church, Westside Baptist Church, Jehovah Missionary Baptist Church, Wedgefield Baptist Church, Trinity Missionary Baptist Church, Wise Drive Baptist Church, or Graham Baptist Church. I’m sure I’ve missed a bunch of them.

One explanation for all of the Baptist churches is that Baptists are good at arguing with each other. Henry Martin Robert was an engineering officer in the Army who wrote Robert’s Rules of Order. His quest for rules for running meetings came from his frustration with trying to preside at a meeting at a Baptist church. One of my friends, who is an American Baptist pastor jokes that it only takes a comma to make a doctrinal argument in the Baptist Church. He also told me that congregations have split over the temperature of the water in the baptistry. I’m pretty sure that the final is either an exaggeration or a joke, but I’m not sure.

Of course, in the Pacific Northwest there are other coffee shops. We have Seattle’s Best Coffee, Whidby Coffee, Cruising Coffee, Woods Coffee, and a dozen independent coffee shops. Statistically Seattle is second to San Francisco when it comes to the number of coffee shops per person. And Washington is the second most coffee obsessed state, falling behind Alaska in per capita coffee shops. But there are a lot of places to get coffee.

Here in South Carolina there are a lot of places to get religion. If you don’t prefer Baptist churches, between Hopewell Baptist and Long Branch Baptist are Redemption Ministries Church, Northwest Christian Ministries Church and Family Restoration Church. And there are churches with denominational names I recognize like Methodist, Presbyterian, Catholic and Episcopal. There are a couple of Lutheran Churches. There are no Congregational Churches in South Carolina. Because of the denomination’s fierce anti-slavery position, those congregations were declared illegal prior to the Civil War. Our denomination, the United Church of Christ has only four congregations in the state. Two of them are in Charleston. The closest one to Sumpter is in Columbia.

Like the Baptists, the African Methodist Episcopal Church has a lot of congregations in the area. If you wanted to worship in an AME church your could choose from St Luke AME Church
Saint Paul AME Church, Bethel AME Church, Mt Olive AME Church, Quinn Chapel AME Church, High Hills AME Church, Wayman Chapel AME Church, Allen Chapel AME Church, Reid Chapel AME Church, Pine Hill AME Church, Clinton Chapel AME Church, orUnion Station AME Church.

There is a new Scooters Coffee Drive Through on Peach Orchard Drive and there is a Starbucks near the Lowes Home Improvement Shop, but coffee shops aren’t as big a deal here in South Carolina as they are in Washington. Then again, there aren’t many restaurants in Washington where you can order sweet tea and get the wonderful elixir that they serve around here. Fast food restaurants are quick to say, “We have REAL sweet tea,” if you inquire. If you ask for a coffee shop, you are likely to be directed to a Dunkin’ Donuts shop, which most likely will not have an espresso machine.

I’m confident that there are more alligators (over 100,000) in South Carolina than coffee shops. We’ve yet to encounter an alligator in our explorations of the area, but we’ve seen some swampy places that look like good alligator habitat. There are no alligators in Washington. The water is too cold, which makes me think that alligators might be Baptists.

It is a joy to have the privilege of traveling to a place that is different from our home. We are enjoying exploring and learning about southern culture and the people of South Carolina. We are, however, outsiders, and there is much that we still do not understand.

The five year old was tired. He said he had no energy. He didn’t even have enough energy to get up from his chair and come to the dinner table. He slid off of the chair onto the floor and laid there for a few minutes. Revived by a tickle and the promise of a hamburger for supper he managed to stand up and make it to the table.

The same five year old, near the end of the day, after school and picture day and a doctor’s appointment and a trip to a big box home store with grandpa, came out of the hobby store with grandma. He had too much energy to simply walk. He had to skip and jump as he made his way to the car.

One night during our visit our daughter prepared a lovely pork loin and green beans with butter. As we sat down to eat the five year old declared that he wanted a hot dog. His mother said, “I think you’ll like this pork. It is really good. At least try a bite.” He agreed to do so. His mother put a very small bite of pork on his fork. He held it up to his mouth and took the smallest sliver of meat from the fork into his mouth. The look on his face was one of nearly complete revision. He chewed and chewed as if he meat was tough and kept the grimace on his face as he did so. Finally he made a big production of swallowing and declared that he did not like the pork. He shook with a little shiver as he repeated his request for a hot dog.

When the hot dog was delivered it was eaten with great relish.

Of course it is impossible to know the career choices of a five year old. It is possible that he will pursue multiple jobs over the course of his adult life. It is possible that his career will be something that we can’t even imagine from this point of view. But if he were to consider one of the many professions available these days, I think that acting might be his ticket. He’s really good at it.

He didn’t dislike the pork. He wanted a hot dog. He wasn’t really out of energy, he just needed the right incentive. And through it all, he is a terrific actor.

Miss Leanne, the kindergarten teacher must have a wonderful job. At least I think that it is a job that I might enjoy. A classroom full of first rate actors who are willing to wear their emotions on their sleeves. There is no attempt at covering up likes and dislikes, joys and sorrows. The entire class is learning how to get the things they want and need in life and they have become very adept at saying the right words and making the right facial expressions and showing the right body language to make their way in this world. Being a teacher of these children must be a new experience every day and more than a few wonderful and funny stories to tell as well.

I once read that being cute is a survival skill for an infant. Born into this world with no ability to provide or care for itself, needing help with everything from eating to keeping clean to controlling body temperature, an infant is totally dependent. But they are incredibly cute and fascinating to watch. We pay attention to them constantly in part because they need attention, but also because they are so fascinating.

What I have learned, however, is that it isn’t just infants who are fascinating. I was clearly charmed by our children when they were infants. I could spend hours just looking at them and studying their faces and behaviors. But I continued to be deeply interested in them as they grew up. I loved their preschool years as they learned that others have feelings and struggled to internalize morality.

I was engaged by our children in their elementary years. I volunteered in their classrooms in part to see how their teachers taught. But I also got incredible meaning and joy from observing their classmates. Each child is unique and different from each other one, but there are some traits that they share.

For all of my life I have been amazed by teens. They can be so capable and yet so senseless all at the same time. They are trying on different ways of being in the life. I once said to a colleague that I enjoyed middle school summer camp because every child changed so much in a week that their parents hardly recognized them when they came to pick them up. If there was a youth who was hard to like at the beginning of the week, just hold on because that person would change. If there was a behavior you didn’t like, hold on and it would change.

Every stage of being a parent has been a joy for me. I feel so grateful that I was given the gift of being a father. Seeing our children as adults with their own families is another phase of life that fills me with awe and joy.

That five year old has a mother who can keep up with him. She can see through the drama and appreciate it for what it is. She can listen intently to not just the words, but the feelings beneath the words and respond to both with grace and ease. She continues to be a wonder and a marvel for me to witness.

As we were riding in the car, we began to discuss plans for the weekend. We were checking weather forecasts and planning potential activities. Not wanting to set up the five year old for a potential disappointment, his mother was spelling some of the words as we talked about plans. When she said, if we go to the Z - o -o, the five year old piped up from the back seat. “I want to go to the zoo.”

I don’t know if it was his mother or Miss Leanne, but one or both of them have been teaching him about letters and words and some pre reader skills. And now he knows how to spell, which will make adult conversations even more challenging. The drama of real life is far more interesting than any show on television.

I am used to chore lists being a part of vacation travel. My father died when I was 27 years old and every visit to my mom until she moved into our home near the end of her life I would arrive and go over the list of things that I could do for my mother. Chores included minor household repairs, hanging pictures, cleaning hard to reach windows, and the like. They were never really big jobs, just little things that were hard for my mother to do. It was natural to me and so having a few chores to do when I travel seems like the way things should be.

When our children were younger, there were always a few “Dad Chores” when we visited them. Usually there were minor car maintenance items such as changing the oil or replacing a light bulb. It seemed like there was always something that aI could do that combined my vacation travel with a few tasks.

Things have shifted a bit with our son now that we live just down the road from their place. There are always things that need doing at the farm. I’ve built fence, repaired windows, milled baseboard, built steps and a small deck, and many other chores. In addition, I’ve added a few farm chores of my own by keeping bees at the place. I also have my shop work, building canoes and kayaks located in the barn at their farm, so there is no end to the tasks to be done when I’m around their place. I try to be helpful for them, asking what needs to be done or what is the highest priority.

I naturally expected that there might be a rather large chore list for this visit to our daughter. Her husband has been deployed for nearly five months overseas and so she has been responsible for their house and raising their son without his usual help. I have been surprised that the list is reasonably short, however. There are a few pictures to hang. Yesterday I replaced a couple of boards in the ramp to the garden shed. It is time to raise the monkey bars on our grandson’s play structure. He’s growing fast and he’s ready for different challenges. I also have gathered materials to replace the door trim on a couple of doors that were chewed by their dog. As chore lists go, my list for this visit is fairly short.

Of course there are always other things I can do. I can wash cars, clean out gutters, and wash windows. I know if I look around there is no shortage of tasks to be done.

A short chore list might be a sign of the passing of generations. I’m growing older and have less energy than once was the case. Even though I’m fairly technologically savvy, I am not used to how much our daughter and her husband are able to keep in constant communication even though he is working half a world away. They video chat a couple of times each day. He consults on home maintenance chores and is very good at talking her though what needs to be done, including telling her where the tools are kept and how to use them.

I know that I don’t have quite as much energy as once was the case. It is also the case that I don’t get bored as easily as I used to. I’m content to sit on the front porch and watch the neighbors go by or sit out back listening to the birds and petting the neighbor’s cat.

Yesterday afternoon we went to our grandson’s soccer practice. Our daughter was out on the field with the children and other parents, kicking the ball, running around, helping children learn the routines, and making sure they listened to the coach. I was content to sit in a lawn chair and watch the action from the sidelines.

Since I am not riding my own bicycle while on this trip, I’ve been riding the exercise bicycle at our daughter’s home. It has a chart printed on it describing the settings for various exercise goals. The chart gives settings for the bike and times to ride based on age and activity level. I realized, however, that I’m off of the chart. The exercise chart ends with age 65 and it has been six years since I was 65.

I guess I need to be honest about my age and ability and accept the fact that I’m not the one who is responsible for all of the chores any more. I can see that our children are very capable at taking care of their families, homes, and vehicles. I recognize that they are better at making certain kinds of decisions than I. When we went to the coast last weekend our daughter did all of the driving, something that I used to always do. She is a safe driver and I’m very comfortable riding with her.

Still, I hope that our children will continue to think up a few chores for me to do when we come to visit. They don’t need to be dramatic or big, just a few things that make me feel useful, and remind me that I can contribute to family life. I’m still pretty good at doing dishes, but I haven’t been asked to do many on this visit. I have done a few and I’m sure I’ll find a few more before we head for home, but is the case when we are not visiting, our daughter is a very capable person and she is responsible to get the necessary chores done.

I’ll pace myself and do just a few chores each day so that I don’t get them done too quickly. Our daughter doesn’t need to have the additional task of thinking up more things to keep me busy. I can be quite content with just being here and visiting her and our grandson. I’ll make sure to get all of the chores done, and I hope that she will have more for me to do when I have done so.

After all, chores are a part of vacation for me, though since I’ve retired, I’m not sure what constitutes a vacation.

We have had a remarkable year when it comes to family birthdays. We have been with each of our grandchildren on that child’s birthday. We also were with our son on his birthday and his wife on her birthday. At the end of this week we will be with our daughter on her birthday. The only birthday we have missed is our son-in-law who has been deployed including on his birthday. Having our daughter as part of an Air Force family we are learning that the enlisted members of the service are not the only ones who sacrifice for national defense. Their families also learn to make sacrifices to support their service.

We began the celebration of our daughter’s birthday a week early by taking a trip with her and her son to Isle of the Palms for some beach time, rest and relaxation, good eating, and fun play. We made the trip this past weekend because our grandson has a soccer match next Saturday and we don’t want to miss that. Birthdays are often rescheduled in our family. We want to give them the time and attention they deserve and sometimes in a busy family with many obligations it doesn’t work out to celebrate on the actual day. So we have gotten used to adjusting our celebrations.

As we left the Isle of Palms today it was raining. It seemed appropriate to have some gray skies and drizzle as we departed. We had exceptional weather during our visit and although there were some clouds, the weather was perfect for playing in the ocean, watching dolphins from the shore, swimming in the swimming pool, and the other activities of our weekend.

Back at her home it hasn’t rained very much. This is a place that can get some heavy rainfall and they have already had the consequences of a hurricane passing through their state this fall bringing torrential rain. It is likely that more rain is in store for South Carolina yet this fall. We were fortunate, however, to have our time at the beach at a time when the weather was good.

I was thinking of gray days because our new home in Washington is in a place that is known for its gray days and rainy weather. It isn’t the wettest part of Washington, nor is it the wettest area of the United States, but we do get quite a few cloudy days from late fall through early spring. For some the gray skies combine with the short days at the 49th parallel to touch off a bit of seasonal affective disorder. So far I haven’t found the weather to be much of a problem for me, but we did invest in some good rain gear to facilitate getting outside. What would be depressing for me would be to have to stay indoors all the time. I like to go outside and breathe fresh air. Owning a good rain jacket, rain paints, and waterproof shoes seems like a good investment in emotional well being.

Many years ago, when we were part of regular trips to Costa Rica to work with our sister church there, we often traveled at the edge of Costa Rica’s rainy season. We got rained on several times, including one time when we had rented a bus to take the children of the church on a field trip to a volcano. We really got wet trying to see the volcano and we had to eat our lunch on the bus to have a dry place for our meal. It was a fun adventure, but not quite what we had planned.

After that time we got into the habit of saying that we’d let George take care of the weather. George Zeise was a pioneer of the sister church relationship and a faithful mission visitor to Costa Rica. He and his wife Mae Louise were beloved both in our congregation and in our sister congregation in Costa Rica. After George passed away it seemed to us to make sense to let George take care of the weather since it was something over which we had no control.

I have no desire to be able to control the weather. What I do wish is that I will maintain the flexibility and sense of adventure required to deal with whatever weather comes my way. I’m pleased to live where I no longer have to shovel large amounts of deep snow from my driveway, but I do occasionally miss the snowy days of winter. I have often said that I put in my seven winters in North Dakota and so do not require the experience of -30 temperatures to feel like I am fully alive. The weather of the place we now live suits me fine.

I do not, however, believe that the weather is superior to weather in other places. We are fortunate to live in a place that has fewer extremes. Summer days rarely climb into the 90s. Winter days usually stay above the teens. That is comfortable for me. And I’m comfortable letting George take care of the weather.

It worked for our family last weekend. We had the weather we needed for the adventure we had chosen. We could hardly ask for more. Thanks, George!

Having said all of that, I am also aware that there are so many for whom the weather has not worked out. Women in Sub-Saharan Africa who are walking long distances to get water for their families because local wells have run dry are the victims of harsh weather. Families along the Fraser River whose homes still cannot be occupied following floods three years ago who have found out that they cannot rebuild because of an additional flow of debris this year are the victims of harsh weather. Those living on South Pacific Islands whose islands are disappearing due to rising sea levels are victims of harsh weather. There are thousands who have been stranded in airports due to harsh weather. Victims of hurricanes and cyclones and tornadoes don’t make light of weather forecasts.

Our attitude towards the weather is a delicate balance. We try to be prepared and have the right equipment to deal with the weather where we find ourselves. We try to pay attention and anticipate major weather events. And we realize that there is also a factor of luck in the weather we receive. May we never forget to be grateful for everyday blessings such as a climate that supports life and the activities we enjoy.

Both of our children graduated from high school in Rapid City South Dakota and both have traveled and lived in distant places since that time. Our son completed his MLA degree at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. When he was a student there, I had at least three job answers about what he was doing in North Carolina. One answer was that he’s following in the footsteps of Michael Jordan, who also graduated from UNC Chapel Hill. Another answer was that he was getting a master’s degree in saying, “Shhhh . . .!” The third answer was that after being raised with all of the southern culture of South Dakota, I sent him up north to North Carolina to absorb a bit of northern culture.

During the time that he was in North Carolina he was married. I drove down when he moved there to help transport his household. Then I made another trip by car for the wedding. Along the way, Susan and I did get an opportunity to learn more about Southern Culture. On one of the trips we stopped to get gas in West Virginia. Across from the gas station was a McDonalds restaurant. Going through the drive up was a man in a pickup. In the cab of the truck with him were three dogs. In the back of the truck was his wife and children. It didn’t seem to us at the tie that it was a typical scene for South Dakota.

Another time Susan tried to order a pecan waffle in a Waffle House Restaurant. The waitress seemed to have trouble understanding what she wanted. Finally a big smile came across the face of the waitress who blurted, “Oh honey! You mean a Pee-can waffle!”

Being northerners we have more than a few biases about southerners, so traveling in the south has been good for us to look beyond those biases.

Now our daughter and her family live in South Carolina and each visit we have made since they moved here in 2020 has been a treat of culture as well as family.

Last night we ate dinner at Coconut Joe’s Beach Grill. We sat on a third floor outdoor balcony overlooking the beach on the Isle of Palms. I had fried shrimp with sausage over cheese grits. It is a meal that isn’t commonly offered in restaurants in the places where we have lived, but it definitely was good eating! And it was easy for me to think, “We’re not in Washington right now.”

The Isle of Palms is a barrier island near Charleston that is about seven miles long. The island has been here for at least 25,000 years enduring fierce storms, hurricanes, wind and waves. The original inhabitants were members of the Seewee nation. After discovery by the British the island has had the names of Hunting Island and then Long Island before gaining its current name of Isle of Palms. It was lightly inhabited for many years, but during the 1970s, real estate development boomed and many hotels, condominiums, and other buildings occupied the beach. It is a popular destination for beach combing, kite flying, surfing, swimming, and sunbathing.

The water of the Atlantic is warmer than the Pacific, on average about 15 degrees warmer at each equal latitude. And we are a lot farther south than our home at Birch Bay. We re roughly at the same latitude as San Diego, California. As a result, the water is warm enough for extended swimming and water play and we are visiting with a five year old grandson who definitely was up for extended water play.

Warner water isn’t the only contrast with the beach where we live. Birch Bay is a gravel beach with some sand exposed at low tide. The beach here on the Isle of Palms is sandy and great fun to feel between the toes as we walked barefoot. I don’t go barefoot at the beach back at home.

We occasionally are treated to visits from harbor seals in Birch Bay and we have sighted gray whales and know of those who have seen Orcas in our Bay. Here on the Isle of Palms we saw dolphins swimming just off the public beach where we were playing.

There are all kinds of different ways to say that we aren’t at home during our visit to the Isle.

Yesterday morning was overcast so we didn’t see much of a sunrise despite being on the east coast. Since I’ve been writing in my journal from time to time about our move to the sunset coast, I was hoping to have a picture of the sunrise coast to post with today’s journal entry. However, since I have been posting an occasional sunrise picture from the west coast, the picture with today’s journal entry is a sunset picture from the east coast. There is a long pier jutting out into the ocean near our vacation rental and our rental included the access code to the pier. We’ve walked out the pier a couple of times since we arrived and went there to look at the sunset and I got a few pictures of the sunset over the water.

The sunset was gorgeous from the other side of our rental as well, looking across the island and I realized that folks who have places on the west side of the island probably don’t get the beautiful sound of the waves crashing to shore, but they probably get some gorgeous sunsets over the water.

Sunrise or sunset, there is so much beauty at the ends of the day that I have come to believe that just as there is a beautiful miracle at each human birth, it seems likely that there is beauty to come at the other end of our lives. Learning to notice the beauty of each day is a way to remain sensitive to and appreciative of the beauty that surrounds us every day.

Here in this place or at home in our place, we are incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by the beauty of creation. I’ll keep looking for sunrises and sunsets as this life’s journey continues.