Years ago we noticed some changes at the home of one of our neighbors. We noticed that there were many days when the wife was not at home. Her car did not return at the end of the work day and we could see, when the garage door was open, that her car was not at home. We speculated about what might be happening. Divorce is common and it seemed possible that the couple had broken up. A few months later we noticed that there was almost no coming and going from the home. The pickup truck sat in the driveway for days at a time without being moved. The grass started to grow long without being cut. There were small chores that were left undone. No one picked up the pine cones in the yard.

After another neighbor mowed the lawn, I spoke with that neighbor who said that he had finally gotten an answer when he went to the door. The man who lived in the home had been suffering from depression and was needing the support of his neighbors. I tried to provide support, making a point of going over to talk with the neighbor whenever I saw him outdoors. One day, when he was working on his pickup, I strolled over and we began to talk. He had, in fact, been divorced from his wife. He had also lost his job. And now his house was in foreclosure. He was trying to work out a way to move to Oregon, where he had relatives and the possibility of a job. The chores of moving out of his house, however, were overwhelming him. He had no money to move, so he had tried to sell some of his possessions. He found a very used camping trailer and removed as much of the interior as he could, leaving only a bunk, so he would have a place to sleep. The rest of the trailer would be loaded with his possessions. Other possessions would be loaded in the back of his pickup. I helped him find some tires for the trailer and got a local shop to pack the wheel bearings for the trip.

Some days it looked like nothing was being accomplished. Other days he would find energy to work. The trailer got packed. There were still a lot of things in the house. I helped him by delivering items to a local thrift store. When the deadline loomed closer, I gave him permission to place some of his things on my lawn so that they would be off of the property on the day he lost possession. I agreed to take items to the dump for him. The pile on my lawn grew.

I gave him a set of sides for his pickup box that fit in the stake holes and would allow him to pile more things in the pickup. He picked out some items to give me in exchange. I didn’t want to accept his possessions, but he insisted. He was running out of room. Finally I made him an offer for two step ladders that he had. He had been in the midst of a do it yourself remodeling project in his basement and had a couple of fairly new stepladders. I traded the sides for the pickup and a tank of gas for the ladders.

I ended up with quite a mess to clean up when he finally pulled out of town. I made two trips with my pickup to get the things dealt with. There was a case of various lawn chemicals that I had to hold until the next toxic waste collection.

That was the end of the story as far as I knew. Various people came and went from the home and it was finally sold and a new couple moved in. I didn’t hear from the old neighbor. I don’t know if he made it to Oregon without major break downs. He had planned to head out across Wyoming, Utah and Nevada before heading north to Oregon. His hope was to avoid the high passes and winter weather that would be a part of the trip had he taken a more direct route through Montana and Idaho.

I’ve never heard from him and I don’t know how things worked out for him. Yesterday, however, I was arranging ladders on the ladder rack on my pickup in preparation for our departure from South Dakota. I thought of our former neighbor as I loaded his ladders and tied them securely to the strong rack. There are many people who move not because they choose to, but because they have no other choice. He had been forced to head out on the highway with all of his possessions because he no longer had a home. He had lost so much that year: a marriage, a job, a home. The grief must have weighed heavily on him.

Since our trip west with our furniture in October, I have been very aware of how many U-Haul trucks and trailers I see. Each one has a story about some individual or family who is moving. Some, like us, are moving to start a new phase of their lives. Some have new jobs and new homes ahead of them. Others, however, are on the road because they have been forced by circumstances to make a major life change. Moving yourself instead of hiring professional movers is a way to save money, but it takes time and energy. It is a luxury we have now that we are retired. Others may not have the same gift of time.

Today as we celebrate All Saints Day, my mind goes to some of the people whose paths have crossed mine who weren’t famous or successful in the eyes of society. I’ve known people who have been caught up in circumstances and overwhelmed with their lives. They weren’t bad people, but some bad things happened to them. Among the saints I have known are people who tried their best to make it in a sometimes hostile world.

I don’t know if my former neighbor was a saint. I don’t know anything of his faith. I do know he was generous with me. I wish him the best. I hope he has been able to rebuild his life. And I have a couple of ladders to remind me of the time when we were neighbors. After he told a parable, Jesus once asked those who were listening, “Which of these do you think was a neighbor?”

I hope I can be a neighbor.

Copyright (c) 2020 by Ted E. Huffman. I wrote this. If you would like to share it, please direct your friends to my web site. If you'd like permission to copy, please send me an email. Thanks!